Krusty: [singing] I slugged some jerk in Tahoe, they gave me one to three, my high-priced lawyer sprung me on a technicality, I'm just visiting Springfield Prison.. I get to sleep at home tonight.
Sideshow Bob: Whenever I could find a spare moment I've tried to murder Bart Simpson. Bart: Aah! Aaah! Aaaahhhhhhh! Homer: He said tried! Marge: Hmm, somebody should really go up there and talk to him! Lisa: [sighs, gets up] Homer: Phew! Sideshow Bob: You do know.. I used to have a problem.. with.. trying to kill people. Cecil: Goodness, I had no idea, for you see I have been on Mars for the last decade, in a cave, with my eyes shut and my fingers in my ears. Sideshow Bob: Touche`, Cecil. Bart: Don't you see what you've done! Sideshow Bob hasn't reformed, he's pure evil. Oh if only you knew what he was thinking! Sideshow Bob's Brain: I hope they still make that Shampoo I like... Marge: You can't ask god to kill someone! Homer: Yeah! You do your own dirty work! Bart: He's planning something evil, I know it. Must have something to do with the towns water supply. Milhouse: Maybe he's going to pee in the river? Bart: Hmm, nah. That's not his style. Bart: No! That's Sideshow Bob! Edna: Uh, that's the last time I announce my dinner plans in class! Cecil: Come now, you speak as if they were a gaggle of slack-jawed jokels! Cletus: Mr. Terwilliger. Come quick, there's trouble down to the ce-ment mixer, sir! See cousin Merl and me was playing fetch with Geech... that's our old smell hound.. Merl: Geech gone to heaven, Mr. Terwilliger! Sideshow Bob: That's it! I'm going to do what I should have done a long time ago...
[to marge] Madam, your children are no more! ... than a pair of ill-bred trouble makers! Sideshow Bob: If he crosses me one more time, just once more... well I can't be held responsible for my actions.. Homer: Well I hope Bob fed you because I ate your dinners. Bart: There's only one place it could possibly be! Lisa: Bob's trailor at the construction site? Bart: ....That's even better! Lets go there.. Lisa: What were you thinking? Bart: The haunted mine... Cecil: I forgot to mention, I'm planning to blow up the dam with you inside.. Sideshow Bob: Well, obviously. Homer: Marge, I'm going to look for the kids
[water gushes down the street, Homer rushes inside until it passes the house, he re-opens the door] Ralph: I think I wet my bed!
