Skinner: And while the school's only ball is being repaired, the following alternative sports will be offered. Dodgerock, volleybrick, and basegame. Milhouse: I wanna play dodgerock! Nelson: You're out! Bart: Way to go, Mrs. K, you finally hooked the skinfish! Edna: It looks good, but I'm not gonna celebrate till he's gaffed, gutted, and hanging in my trophy room. Hah! Bart: We have the same dream, mam!
Marge: I'm glad I sent the kids to grampa's to protect their innocent minds! Abe: And here's some more Germans we killed. That flamethrower really toasted their waffles. Lisa: Grampa how do you sleep at night!? Abe: They drug us! Skinner: Homer this bachelor party seems to have peaked. Could you please return my pants, and or underpants so I can go home. Homer: Come on, it's your last night of freedom. You gotta have some fun! Skinner: Who are all of you people? Carl: We're your buddies! Come on Homer's kid's principal, have a beer. Skinner: Here's something I've wanted to say to you for a long time. Am I a good principal? Chalmers: You're the best we could get with the funds at our disposal. Wiggum: Sorry to bother you but we got an anonymous tip about loud music and a strip-da-diddly-dipper. Carl: Oh marriage is gonna be great. Now you'll have someone who'll rub your back. Without being asked. Lenny: Oh, not this again. Carl: Yes, this again! Skinner: I'm starting to get cold feet. Please don't tell anybody. Homer: Don't worry. Your secret's safe with me. Marge, guess what, Skinner wants to bail on his wedding! Skinner: Homer, you're still talking to me! Homer: Oh man is this awkward. I'm outta here. Homer: Yeah Marge it looks like you got the last perfect man. Oh by the way can I borrow your car tomorrow, mine's acting up. :shot of flaming car: Homer: Hey, you're the one always bugging me to screw up our marriage. Marge: Spice up! Spice up! Homer: Don't worry, I've got a man on the perimeter. Bart: Cowabunga One to Fat Load. Homer: This is Fat Load. I'd like to request a new codename. Bart: Denied Homer: Okay, Fat Load here. Otto: Mrs. K you look awesome! Edna: Thankyou, Otto! Otto: That cloud looks awesome. That rock looks awesome. My hands look awesome! Edna: Happy 50th Anniversary, Seymour. I was thinking it might be time to combine our CD collections. Skinner: Oh I don't know Edna, I'm not quite ready to take that plunge. Agnes: Seymour! My larvael sack fell in the toilet, go fish it out! Skinner: Quick Edna, I'll use your purse as a scoop! Lovejoy: We are gathered together today to join Seymour and Edna in holy matrimony. Does anyone present know any reason why these two should not be wed. Edna: I do! Lovejoy: No, you say that part later.
Sideshow Mel: He's a she! Patty: She's a he.
Edna: What is the center of the circulatory system. It's the heart! Nelson: The heart? You mean like Principal Skinners? Which you broke? Edna: What do you care you hate Principal Skinner. Nelson: Eh, Bro's before Ho's Edna: Nelson! I'll see you after class! Nelson: I'll be there, will YOU?
Skinner: Oh god, I've lost the love of my life. Bart's right I am a weiner.
Skinner: Every second without you is like a million kicks in the crotch!
Skinner: Just why am I taking your advice? Homer: Because I'm successfully married. Skinner: There's no ring on that finger. Homer: Oh why did I take it off? Oh right, to see if I could skip it across lake Michigan.
Edna: Is there a Mrs. Comic Book Guy? Comic Book Guy: Well I was married once. In an online fantasy game. We were thinking of having children but that would have severely drained my power crystals.
Edna: Would you like to get some coffee? Comic Book Guy: And a family bucket of chicken!
Comic Book Guy: You've made it to my car and you haven't left. A new record! Edna: Oh, I love your black tinted windows. Comic Book Guy: Actually they are trash bags. Could you give me a pushing start.
Kids: Oh Edna K, Oh Edna K, Oh Edna K, Oh Edna K, Oh Edna K, Oh Edna K, Oh Edna K, Oh Edna K, Ooooooh.. Skinner: Miss Krabappel, a sad principal is desperate and needy, if you come home I wont die alone, and that's what I'd prefer. Bart: Oh pleeeeeaaase, settle for Seymour. So pleeeeeaaase come back to the dork!
Skinner: Where is she? Comic Book Guy: My beloved is napping blissfully in the many folds of my Spiderman t-shirt.
Comic Book Guy: I adore Edna. She is near mint and comes from a very limited edition. Females who will talk to me.
Bart: The Bi-mon-sci-fi-con? Skinner: You've heard of it? Is it romantic? Bart: Hey, women would put out just to get out of there.
Marge: I wish you'd devote this much time and attention to our relationship! Homer: Don't worry Marge, we'll get something to eat!
Dr. Hibbert: Oh my goodness it's Matt Groening! Lenny: Wooaah, the creator of Futurama! Milhouse: Mr. Groening, will you autograph my Bender doll? Matt Groening: Suuuure, I'm happy to give anyone my autograph, any time or anywhere. On the street, in the store, or on my private property. But why be happy with just an autograph. What about an original sketch or snippit of my hair. And don't forget to pull my beard, they say it's good luck!
Comic Book Guy: Edna, the Klingons have a romantic saing. :speaks Klingon: Roughly translated it means I would kill the children of a thousand planets just to see you smile. Edna: Oh, that is the most romantic thing I've ever heard. Which is kinda sad if you think about it.
Edna: I'm not marrying you either. Comic Book Guy: There are a million valid reasons but which one did you pick? Edna: We've had a great time together but we're too different. Comic Book Guy: I don't understand. Edna: It's like I'm DC Comics and you're Marvel. Comic Book Guy: I understand completely!
Agnes: I'll make you some hot cocoa while you sit in your shame closet and think about what you did. Skinner: Well, at least I went down like a man. Agnes: You look like a Malaysian transexual!
