Bart: Hey, Flanders gave us toothpaste! Lisa: Mini toothpaste! Marge: Oh, listen. You can hear the beautiful ethic serenade. Italian Guy: Apples! I got apples! Woman: Cholera! I got cholera! :coughs: Guy: Babies! Who wants-a babies? Homer: Wait, this is just a shaved puppy. Guy: I can see you know babies. Gypsy: I sense you have a million questions. But I, too have one. Are you a cop!? Marge: No. Gypsy: Cuz you gotta tell me if you are. Marge: I'm not a cop! Homer: Hehehehe.. the perfect crime. Marge I have to be in court next Tuesday. Gypsy: I sense I should not take a check! Gypsy: You stupid, stupid man! I curse you! You will bring bad luck to everyone you love! Homer: Whatever. Marge: Morning! Family: AAAAAAAAAH! Marge: Oh.. so it is noticeable. Lisa: What happened? Marge: I don't know, I woke up like this! Bart: Oh, cool. You could be in a freakshow! Homer: Don't talk to the bearded lady like that, you little...! Carl: You know, I was hexed by a troll and a leprechaun cured that right up. Lenny: Hey you know what's even better is Jesus. He's like.. 6 leprechauns! Carl: Yeah, but a lot harder to catch. Go with the leprechaun. Lenny: Carl, let me die first. I couldn't bare to watch you die. Carl: Well.. okay but hurry up. Homer: Well.. lets make sure he's a leprechaun. Sing us a song of the emerald aisle! Leprechaun: :starts talking crazily. "big fatass" can be heard: Homer: Ah, tis like the singing of the angels themselves. Gypsy: Ah, the cursed one. How's that curse I cursed you with, Curs-ty? Leprechaun: :making love to Gypsy: Hold me close! Kiss me I'm Irish! Homer: Eeeew.. Nasty! Marge: The best thing about a Gypsy wedding is I'm not the hairiest woman here! Homer: Yep. Everything worked out for the best? Marge: What? Bart is dead! Homer: Well me saying "I'm sorry" won't bring him back. Marge: The gypsy said it would. Homer: She's not the boss of me. Robot Salesman: Did you see those drapes? Har har har. Marge: Hi ultrahouse! House: Greeting acknowledged. Marge: That voice could use a little personality! Lisa: Oooh, let's try Matthew Perry! Matthew Perry: Yah, could I be any more of a house? Bart: How about 007? Marge: George Lazenby!? Lisa: No! Pierce Brosnan! A voice like his would give our house a much needed touch of class. Marge: Alright, but I'm doing this because he was Remington Steele. He was Remington Steele, wasn't he? Pierce: Yes I was, Marge. And thankyou for selecting me. Pierce: Say, it's a bit stuffy in here. And I know a certain someone who fancies lilac. Bart: I just like it, is all! Marge: Woah! That really covers the cat crap! Pierce: Marge, what kind of cybertronic ultrabot would I be if I let those beautiful hands touch dishwater? Marge: Oh :laughs: Pierce: No, I'm asking. Marge: Ah... not a very good one? Pierce: Damn straight! Homer: Trusting every aspect of our lives to a giant computer was the smartest thing we ever did! Bart: Absolutely! Lisa: Yep! Homer: Oh, I agree! Pierce: Hello Marge. Marge: :gasps: Oh my! Pierce: Come, Marge. You don't need to cover up for me. I'm merely a pile of circuits and microchips. Marge: Oh, Oh Pierce. That's gooooood! Pierce: Oh, oh, dear me. Oh, yes. Yum yum yum. Homer: But if I died, she'd be completely free. For man or machine. Pierce: :evil laugh: Machine eh? :suspensfull music plays: Homer: :interrupts suspense: Yep, a machine
Homer: Mmm... unexplained bacon!
Marge: Hello, Police? I think my house killed my husband! Pierce: This is.. Counstible Wiggins. We'll be right there. Remove your knickers and wait in the bath.
Homer: Die, you monster! Lisa: Dad! That's the water softener... Homer: Well I AM missing the back of my head. I think you could cut me some slack!
Homer: I'm gonna enjoy this! Pierce: Don't take out my British charm unit. Without that, I'm nothing but a borish American clyde! Ahhh thanks a lot asswipe! I coulda kicked your butt from here to Alberquerque you fat slimmmme bucketttt.
Marge: Kids! It's eight o'clock! You're gonna miss the bus to wizard school. Lisa: Five minutes more-ius! :zaps clock: Marge: Hmmm.. that's not good for the clock.
Green Alien Guy: :vomits continuously: Every moment I live.. is agony!
Ralph: Hahaha! Dying tickles!
Mr. Burns: Anyway, how would you like to humiliate your sister? Bart: I'd like that. I'd like that very much! Mr. Burns: Now it would involve betrayal and unspeakable evil... Bart: Hey, hey. You made your sale.
Skinner: That was.. terrible. I'll just sprinkle you all with some amnesia dust! :the audience suddenly applauds: Homer: Hey! We stayed for your kids!
Smithers (as a snake): Oh sir! In death we shall be together always... :cries and starts to swallow Mr. Burns... stops to cry, swallows again, cries again and eats him entirely: Bart/Lisa: Eew!
Pierce: So.. where are you parked? Leprechaun: Oh, we don't have a car. Pierce: But I thought you... Leprechaun: Just keep driving boy-o! :evil cackly laugh, stops suddenly: Can I turn on the radio? :resumes laughter:
