Guy: Welcome to the Springfield YMCA. Tonight you can sample all our classes for free, and if you find one you like, you can pay the membership fee and enrol. Everybody: :laughter: Guy: Heh, I know.. we'll never see any of you again. Homer: Got that right.
Mr. Burns: Well, this is a high scoring affair! Abe: Yeah, well it's your turn to get the ball out of the peach basket. Mr. Burns: I'll get your ball out of your peach basket one of these days. Lougash: I'm sorry little girl, Lougash must go next door to anger management class.... worthless... ANGER MANAGEMENT CLASS! I HATE IT SO MUCH! I... SPIT ON IT! Lenny: I'll pick.. uuh... Carl! Carl: Lenny and Carl. I kinda like the sound of that! Skinner: Hmm, my turn huh? Lets see.. Homer: Pick me! Pick me! I've got hoop dreams coach! I got em bad! Skinner: Okay, Homer! Homer: Yes! Losers! Looosers! Looosers! L.. you said Homer, right? Skinner: Mmmhmm... Homer: Loooosers! Lenny: Uuuh, I'll take Professor Frink Frink: Ah you wont regret it my good man, what with the passing and the dribbling and my shoes made of the FLUBBER! And away I go, excitening! Ow, that was painful! Oh the Flubber is burning my feet! Carl: I am so sick of everyone assuming I'm good at basketball because I'm African-American. :slam dunks: Go Carl! Go Carl! It's my birthday! It's my birthday! Three-P! You got maaail, baby! Homer: Okay guys, I've got a secret play I've been saving for the Olympics, or possibly the final four. And it goes something like this.
:mumbles: Skinner, I want you to block out Carl. Moe, you can take Professor Frink, Homer you take Groundskeeper Willie.. No way am I taking Groundskeeper Willie.. Yes you are, are you a team player or not? Dr. Hibbert: It will take plenty of time in Rehab before you can go back to work. Homer: Miss work? But my life would be nothing without the Nucleon Plant. Dr. Hibbert: You're also responsible for this hefty hospital bill. You shouldn't have ordered all those hospital hair-cut's and porno films! Homer: But Doctor Screwlittle sounded like a delightful romp! Well you don't have to worry about the bill, we've never... LOOK, A BEAR! Run! :falls over and breaks leg again: Barney: Mrs. Simpson.. can Homer come out and play? Marge: Homer won't be able to play for a long time! Homer: Two weeks, what am I supposed to do? Just sit on my ass and watch TV? That aint my style, man. Dr. Hibbert: Now Homer, there are people right through that door that have it much worse than you! Homer: No they don't! Craig: Uh, Mr. Simpson, you weren't supposed to leave the home. Abe: Thankyou Ping-Pong! Craig: My name is Craig. Abe: Suuuuuure it is! Ned: Hey Homer! Homer: Oh it feels so good to talk to another human being.. :mumbles: Stupid Flanders!
Homer: Marge isn't here, she had to identify a body at the morgue. Marge: That's not my Uncle Lou.. and this man's not dead. Hans Moleman: That's what I've been trying to tell you!
Bill Cosby: Now my good man, what do you like to play? Kid: Pokemon! Bill Cosby: Pokemon!? Pokemon with the poke and the mon and the thing where the guy comes out of the thing, and he makes a fraaagh fr fra aagh aagh aagh! Homer: Hehe.. that is the darndest thing!
Rod: Can Mr. Simpson watch us every day? Ned: Oh, Roddy, he's not running a daycare center! Homer: Don't tell me what I'm not doing.. Ned: So you are running a daycare center? Homer: Oh, you'd like that wouldn't you. Ned: Oh I sure would! It'd give the boys a place to go after school. Homer: Then I'll do it! Just to see the look on your face...... that's the one!
Apu: Hello, I'd like to take advantage of your baby prison. Marge: Uuh, we're calling it daycare. Apu: Yes, whatever just take them. Homer: Oh, aren't they sweet. Any medical things I should know about? Apu: :running: Yes, probably.
Rod: Uncle Homer, will you sing us that crazy song we love? Homer: Hehe, Okay :singing: Is that all there isssssss, Is that all there issss? If that's all there is my friend, then let's keep danciiiiing.
Homer: If you're happy and you know it say a swear! Nelson: Boobs! Milhouse: Hiney! Ralph: Mitten!
Milhouse: Where's Ralph? Ralph: :happily: I almost died!
Homer: See, the thing is.. there are no bad kids. Bart: Ow! You stepped on my arm! Homer: Sorry, daddy thought you were a pile of cable.
Krusty: :singing: I'm a nice guy, I'm a hell of a guy, and tonight we honour you! Stop the music! Stop it! One more line and we have to pay for the song!
Krusty: Now, is anyone here from Springfield? Kirk: You know we are! Krusty: Tough crowd!
Krusty: Now, I'm told there's a glitch in our internet webcast, so all of you out there, type control, backslash, semi-colon, alt, dot, escape, and you'll be fine. Comic Book Guy: :pushing buttons: Ah, perfect Krusty: :on computer screen: Hey hey! Hey hey! Hey hey! Hey hey!
Ralph: Where are we going? Homer: :crazily: Uh.. for frosty chocolate milkshakes! Frosty chocolate milkshaaakes!
