9F02: Lisa The Beauty Queen
SEASON FOUR :: 15 Quotes
Willie: Get your Haggis right here! Chopped heart and lungs boiled in a wee sheep's stomach! Tastes as good as it sounds.
beauty1.mp3
Skinner: But first our second prize winner and the recipient of this handsome shoe buffer... Ned Flanders.
Flanders: :gasps:
Homer: Oh it's no fair, we'll never have a buffer!
Marge: We have one at home, you never use it.
Homer: Well, I want that one!
beauty2.mp3
Homer: Heyyy thereeee, blimpy boy! Flying through the sky so fancy free!
beauty3.mp3
Homer: You're cute as a bug's ear.
Lisa: Fathers have to say that stuff!
Homer: Dad, am I cute as a bug's ear?
Grampa: No, you're homely as a mule's butt!
Homer: There, see?
beauty4.mp3
Homer: Moe, have you ever felt unattractive?
Moe: Mmmm, no.
Homer: How about you, Barney?
Barney: Not for a second! (*belch*)
beauty5.mp3
Larson: Your daughter could be crowned Little Miss Springfield by our host, the Maitre d' of Glee, Krusty the Clown.
Krusty: I heartily endorse this event or product.
beauty6.mp3
Marge: Lisa, I know a song that will cheer you up. `There once was an ugly duckling...''
Lisa: So you think I'm ugly?!
Marge: Noooo. No, I meant you were one of the good-looking ducks... that makes fun of the ugly one. Mmmm.
beauty7.mp3
Homer: Hey, nobody's prettier than my little girl!
Marge: Mmmmm, you're looking at her through a father's eyes.
Homer: Well if I could gouge out somebody else's eyes and shove them into my my sockets I would; but to me, she's beautiful!
Marge: That is so sweet!
beauty8.mp3
Homer: Is that Lisa? Oooo, I gotta call heaven. There's an angel missing! Bart: And whose your little school friend? Wait a minute... That's Mom!
Marge: I know two fellas who will get a special dinner tonight!
:Bart and Homer high five:
Bart: Dad, do you know anything else about women?
Homer: Nope, that's it.
beauty9.mp3
Lisa: Some people say that to love your country is old fashioned, uncool, real melvin, well to them I say... :sings ``America the Beautiful'', then strips off her dress, revealing dancing tights, and unleashes a rip-roarin' song-and-dance rendition of ``Rollin' on the River'' :
beauty10.mp3
Krusty:
L the losers in her wake,
I the income she will make,
T is for her tooth-filled mouth,
T is for her tooth-filled mouth...
beauty11.mp3
Krsuty: Congratulations Lisa, you're the new Little Miss Springfield. Here's your sceptre. Whoop.. hehehe, just kidding! Here you go. Whoop! hahahehehe. :gets struck by lightning: I deserved that.
beauty12.mp3
Homer: Bless you boys.
Marge: Homer, those are ice cream men!
Homer: I know!
beauty13.mp3
Quimby: Gentlemen, we need to get Lisa Simpson out and Amber Dempsey back in. But this glorified crossing god of a police chief wont get off his big fat can.
Wiggum: Is it okay if I open these potato chips.
beauty14.mp3
Kent: Lisa Simpson is no longer Little Miss Springfield. She was stripped of her crown in a ceremony earlier today :footage of a goat being bottle fed plays: Well, that's obviously the wrong footage. Uh. But it does seem the father of the deposed beauty queen Homer Simpson filled out the pageant application incorrectly. In the area under 'do not write under this space' he wrote 'okay'.
beauty15.mp3 |