7F01: Two Cars In Every Garage And Three Eyes On Every Fish
SEASON TWO :: 10 Quotes
Reporter: And uh, what's your name, son?
Bart: I'm Bart Simpson, who the hell are you?
Reporter: I'm Dave Shutton, an investigative reporter who's on the road a lot and I must say in my day we didn't talk that way to our elders.
Bart: Well this is my day, and we do, sir.
Inspector: Okay men, got your counters on.
:counters pick up large amount of radiation immediately:
Burns: I suppose that's normal background radiation, the kind you'd find in any nuclear facility, or for that matter, playgrounds and hospitals?
Inspector: In 20 years I have never seen such a shoddy, deplorable --
Burns: Oh look! Some careless person has left thousands and thousands of dollars just lying here on my coffee table. Uh, Smithers, why don't we leave the room and hopefully when we return, the pile of money will be gone. :exits and enters again: Look Smithers. The money and a very stupid man are still here.
Homer: Where are we going, sir?
Burns: To create a new and better world.
Homer: If it's on the way, could you drop me off at my house?
Announcer: Please stay tuned for paid political announcement brought to you by the friends of Montgomery Burns.
Abe: Burns? Change the channel.
Jasper: You change it!
Abe: No, you change it.
Jasper: I changed it last week!
Abe: Fine, be a jerk, we'll just sit here and watch it.
Song: Only a moron wouldn't cast his vote for Monty Burns.
Man: Congratulations, Mr. Burns, the latest polls show you're up six points.
Burns: Ah, giving me a total of?
Man: Six. But we're on our way!
Homer: Kids, please leave the room, I don't want you to see this.
Bart: Uh oh :kids leave the room in a flash:
Homer: :to Marge: Please please please please please please please?
Homer: Bart, would you like to say grace?
Bart: Dear god. We paid for all this stuff ourselves, so thanks for nothing.
Burns: :struggling: Smithers, tip over this table for me!
Marge: Homer, Homer, make them stop.
Homer: Uh.. Mr. Burns. Um. Mr Burns?
Burns: Shut up and wreck something!