DABF02: She Of Little Faith
SEASON THIRTEEN :: 28 Quotes
Lisa: That's just a dog in a spacesuit!
Bart: From the looks of it... a male dog.
Announcer: We will return to our film after these very loud messages!
Bart: Hey Lis', is dad's credit card number 5784 3653 4341 0709?
Lisa: You know it is.
Homer: :singing to Devo's "Crack That Whip": When you have a rib of steak, you must floss it! Oh that meatloaf tasted great, you must floss it! Floss it! Floss it good!
Milhouse: I didn't know your dad was so interested in science!
Bart: Uuh, he didn't say science, he said.. pie-pants.
Homer: Mmmm... Pie pants.
Milhouse: My eyebrows! My beautiful eyebrows!
Bart: Over 'ere, guvnah!
Homer: The word 'unblowuppable' is thrown around a lot these days. But I think I can say with confidence that :explosion heard: Okay.. that shows you what could potentially happen.
Marge: This is the worst thing you've ever done!
Homer: You say that so much it's lost all meaning.
Kearney: Fixing this church should be our top priority. And I say that as a teenager and a parent of a teenager.
Woman: Reverend, how would you feel about wearing this robe?
Burns: Too bad! You've already signed the deal!
Woman: Actually he hasn't.
Burns: Oh well we highly value your input... until you sign the deal!
Woman: Let me handle this, Monty.
Burns: Good idea! I'll be hiding behind that tree.
Lisa: What are they doing to the church!?
Woman: We're rebranding it. We prefer a faith based emporium teeming with impulse buy items.
Lisa: I feel like I want to throw up!
Woman: Then my work is done.
Lovejoy: And now let us rise and... um... ummm...
Woman: He's not gonna say it!
Burns: Trust me he'll say it or I'll bust him down to Friday night vespers.
Lovejoy: ..and thank Crazy Larry, whose big screen TV prices are insane- ane-ane!
Lisa: I'm leaving this church forever!
Marge: Oh no!
Homer: I don't know how to feel!
Marge: You should be very upset!
Homer: Got it! :cries loudly: how was that?
Marge: A little much!
Homer: :sobs gently:
Lisa: Lord, I'm not turning my back on you. I just need to find a temple that's free of corruption.
Marge: :pretending to be god: Why do you have to be soooooo different? Always making a big deal out of evvvvvverything! ooooOooooooh!
Lisa: Mom! I know it's you!
Carl: If I didn't have inner peace, I'd completely go psycho on all you guys, all the time.
Lenny: Who's Buddah?
Richard Gere: It's a good thing Buddhism teaches freedom from desire because I've got the desire to kick your ass!
Richard Gere: We all have dreams. Mine is of a free Tibet.
Lisa: That would be so great.
Lenny: I dream about meatball sandwiches. All you can eat for two bucks!
Richard Gere: Good luck.
Carl: Hey Richard. In "An Officer And A Gentleman", did you really do all those sit-ups?
Richard Gere: I wish. I did one and they just showed it a thousand times.
Lisa: :shouting: I'm a Buddhist! Hey I'm a Buddhist!
Ned: My satan-sense is tingling! Into the root cellar boys!
Todd: When can we come out?
Ned: Maybe never!
Homer: So you think you know better than this family, eh? Well as long as you're in my house you'll do what I do and believe what I believe! So butter your bacon!
Bart: Yes father.
Lisa: Mom, dad, my spiritual quest is over!
Homer: Hold that thought... Bacon up that sausage, boy!
Bart: But dad, my heart hurts!
Nelson: Hey Simpson, I hear your sister dumped Christianity!
Bart: Who cares?
Dolph: I'll tell you someone who cares. He's got long hair, works as a carpenter, has a lot of crazy ideas about love and brotherhood!
Jimbo: His name's Gunther and he's dating my mom. Sometimes he buys us beer.
Bart: I thought Kearney was dating your mom.
Kearney: Hey, she came on to me.
Burns: So the good news is that church revenue is up one thousand and seventy three percent!
Lovejoy: And when will the church see any of this money?
Burns: :loudly: When hell freezes over, suckers! :laughs evilly: Oh whatever, just take it!
Lisa: Well they do.. smell good!
Marge: Mmm, it's a pity! :throws cookies in the bin:
Bart: Alright! Trash cookies! Uh oh! I think I ate a dog food lid.
Lisa: My family tried to trick me into celebrating Christmas!
Richard Gere: Y'know, we are meditating.
Lisa: Oh, sorry.
Richard Gere: No that's alright. I was only about to achieve enlightenment. But who'd want that?
Lenny: Who likes short shorts?
Carl: I like short shorts.
Lisa: I can really celebrate Christmas?
Richard Gere: You can celebrate any holiday! And you know, my birthday is August 31st!
Lisa: Oh! I'll send you an email greeting card.
Richard Gere: Sweet.
Homer: I did it, I found our dog! Now our Christmas is complete!
Marge: We were looking for Lisa!
Lisa: Hey where's my pony?
Marge: Yes! Merry Christmas to us all!
Lisa: I'm serious, make with the pony!
Marge: And a happy and healthy new year!
Lisa: Here Clip Clop, here pony pony!
Marge: Happy happy new year!