CABF21: The Blunder Years
SEASON THIRTEEN :: 32 Quotes
Marge: Putting away groceries, it's like unwrapping presents from yourself.
Marge: Spill something else!
Lisa: Mom, I believe you!
Marge: Spill it! Oh Burley, you're insatiable!
Marge: Oh Burley, you're so rugged and manly!
Homer: Marge, a bee almost stung me today I felt the wing go right by my ear.
Marge: Oh, it's okay Homey. The bee is all gone!
Burley: Fantasize Marge. Fantasize about Burley!
Homer: Hey, you're looking at that spokesjack! Well I can fantasize too! Ooh Mama Celeste!
Celeste: You touch me and I cut you!
Paul Newman: Homer, I'll tell you what I told redford. It aint gonna happen.
Homer: Hello, this is Chad Sexington, the model for Burley paper towels.
Marge: :gasp: How did you get my number!?
Homer: I.. don't know. But I was quite moved by your letter.
Ned Flanders: Playing a prankeroo, hey?
Homer: I was having a private conversation with my wife in the guise of Chad Sexington. Do you mind?
Lisa: Now you've done it, you really humiliated mom!
Homer: It was hard on me too! I had to wear a suit!
Marge: I guess it was a pretty funny prank! I like the ones where nothing catches on fire.
Homer: Yeah. Nothing is hurt except feelings.
Frink: Oh dear, I've re-dorkulated!
Homer: I am in your power, boss me around.
Hypnotist: When I snap my fingers, you will transform into a famous historian! :snap:
Homer: Look at me, I'm a famous historian. Out of my way!
Hypnotist: Thankyou, now you are Emily Dickinson. :snap:
Homer: Look at me, I'm Angie Dickinson! Out of my way!
Homer: I'm twelve years old! I'm with my friends! It's a beautiful summer day at the old swimming hole. :starts screaming and continues to do so for 36 seconds:
Homer: :still screaming:
Marge: Oh no!
Carl: Sorry Mrs S, he kinda disrupted things at work!
Lenny: Yeah he ruined naptime and quiet time.
Marge: Well, is anything coming back to you?
Homer: There have been so many classic Simpsons moments. I remember the time I tried to jump Springfield Gorge
Homer: I'm gonna make it!
Lisa: No, dad! Everyone's sick of that memory!
Carl: Moe, what are you doing here?
Moe: What am I? My bar is empty is what. Why aint you guys there?
Moe: Ah. Look at all them stars. Bunch of lazy lights, don't do nothing for nobody.
Carl: Hey you know what I'm looking forward to? The future. Have you heard about this inter-net thing?
Carl: Yeah it's the inner netting they invented to line swim trunks. It provides a comforting snugness.
Carl: Could you imagine us working there? The whole Carl Crew!?
Lenny: Hey I thought we were called Lenny And The Jets?
Moe: Ah you're both wrong. We're the Moe Syzlac Experience featuring Homer.
Lenny: Only a moron would jump into tha..
Homer: Geronimooooooooooooooooh my god! :lands in mud, cries:
Moe: And there's your watchamacall repressed trauma. I mean, who likes getting muddy. It's terrible. Okay, lets go to Moe's now.
Homer: Wait a minute! I remember falling in the mud, but I don't think that's why I've been screaming.
Moe: Fine, crap all over my theory.
Bart: This sounds like a case that only the Simpson family can solve!
Moe: Oh.. Okay uh...we'll just be going then.
Homer: Hey, you guys can come with us...
Moe: No, no. You said Simpson family, you know, it sounded exciting but ah.. we don't want to intrude.
Marge: Thanks for understanding.
Moe: Oh... Oh okay. Well uh.... cya.
Homer: Yep, the old quarry is just a stone's throw away!
Lisa: Stop saying that, dad!
Marge: Maybe we should come back in the daytime!
Homer: Someone's yellow belly is showing!
Bart: Oh, sorry.
Wiggum: I saw your car by the gate and I thought you might be lost hikers. Cuz then I could rescue you, and be a hero, and maybe the city would give me a coupon for free guitar lessons.
Wiggum: Aw heck, it's just an old shopping cart.
Homer: And it's empty. Put it back. I don't want to see it this way!
Homer: Now do you believe dead rats float, Lisa?
Burns: What are you doing in my corpse hatch!
Wiggum: Montgomery Burns, you're under arrest for murder.
Burns: Did I say corpse hatch? I meant.. innocence tube!
Burns: So. You're a baby, huh? How's that working out for you?
Burns: Look at your heroic daddy in there. Making funny faces, falling to the floor, shedding his hair...lying.. perfectly..still. Oh dear.
Smithers: Well I'm glad to know he died a hero, instead of that other way.
Burns: I told him his father was killed in the Amazon by a tribe of savage women. I hope it didn't affect you in any way.
Smithers: We'll never know, sir.
Moe: Hey, hey. I found a clue that's going to bust your mystery wide open!
Marge: Sorry we already solved it!
Moe: Ah.. well.. you wanna take a look at it anyways? Just for ha-ha's?
Homer: Seems kinda pointless now.
Moe: Yeah I guess you're right. It's just that I went to a lot of trouble, you know, making the envelope and everything.
Marge: Mm. Let's see what you have, Moe.
Moe: Okay, now this first thing is just going to look like a used bandaid, and it is, but the rest of the stuff don't make no sense without it, so you know, bear with me.
Marge: Wow Moe, you've been doing a lot of sluething!
Moe: Oh yeah, oh yeah I sluethed my ass off on this one. Um, okay, this is a number 6 from somebody's address. Or.. is it a 9? You don't know! Ah, this is gravel, okay? Gravel. This is uuh... that's more gravel. Okay, oh, this is a shell. That.. to me, this is just me talking. It looks like a helmet for a mouse. Now, that sounds crazy, right? But, if you ask the mice about it they don't say nuttin'. I mean, they run the other way. At first I was just fishing with the helmet thing, but then from the mouse... reaction I got, I.. got a little more.. concerned.
Homer: You really made that envelope? Cuz it says Hemermille over here.
Moe: Um.... no.