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CABF08: Worst Episode Ever
SEASON TWELVE :: 27 Quotes
Bart: Good pancakes, mom!
Marge: Thank you honey! They come in a squeeze bottle now! :she squeezes, it makes a flatulent noise: Woo! Uh, I better put on the silencer.
worst1.mp3    85kb 

Lisa: Eeew, how long has this baking soda been in here?
Marge: I dunno, it came with the house.
Bart: Hey dad, I bet you five bucks you can't eat the whole box!
Homer: Five? Why don't we make it fifty. Ooh, you're going to regret this!
Lisa: I'll call Poison Control.
worst2.mp3    112kb 

Milhouse: Can I see the fifty Bart, can I? Huh?
Bart: Milhouse my friend, you and I are going on a spending spree.
Milhouse: My doctor says I'm not supposed to go on spree's.
Bart: What about jags?
Milhouse: Jags are fine.
Bart: Wonderful.
worst3.mp3    97kb
Bart: Ooh! Too much raw bacon!
Milhouse: Come on, Bart. We can't stop spending now. There's one thing I've always wanted to do. My mom doesn't believe in fabric softener. But she's not around. Hehehehe!
Bart: I'm picking the next thing.
worst4.mp3    123kb
Comic Book Guy: Please do note, this is no ordinary comic book. It is in mint condition. If you spill soda on it, the drops fly off harmlessly onto lesser comics.
Bart/Milhouse: Wooooah
Comic Book Guy: 'Tis a quite corrective gasp.
worst5.mp3    75kb
[ Homer reminisces about the time he was banned from seeing Gallagher's performances. ]
worst6.mp3    126kb
Homer: Don't worry your spikey little head. I've got it all planned out.
Bart: How could you have it planned out, you just heard about the problem.
Homer: You're right. Give me a minute. Hmmm...
worst7.mp3    72kb 
Homer: :putting on accent: Hellooo. I'm Shaquille O'Neill. Let us in, please!
worst8.mp3    36kb 
Tom Savini: Good evening :burps: Uh, sorry. I had a really big dinner.
Homer: Woo! Dinner!
worst9.mp3    41kb 
Bart: Yeah! That should be us covered with blood.
worst10.mp3    17kb 
Comic Book Guy: Breath.. short... left..arm.. numb. Can't go on.. describing.. symptoms much longer :collapses:
worst11.mp3    83kb 
Dr. Hibbert: Young man, you've had what we call a cardiac episode!
Comic Book Guy: Worst episode ever.
worst12.mp3    38kb
Dr. Hibbert: You... do have friends, don't you?
Comic Book Guy: Well... the SuperFriends...
worst13.mp3    31kb 
Dr. Hibbert: Calm down. Don't make me put a dog heart in there!
worst14.mp3    22kb 

Milhouse: Okay, here's Comic Book Guy's instructions. A carton of malten milk balls, one box confectioner sugar, a can of chocolate frosting.
Bart: That's just his shopping list.
Milhouse: No.. it's his instructions.
worst15.mp3    85kb 

Bart: Uh uh. You've gotta be 40 inches tall for the adult section.
Ralph: Pleeeeease?
Bart: Okay. But get on your tippy-toes.
Ralph: Everybody's hugging!
worst16.mp3    94kb 

Homer: Now, when you've got a bumbed ticker like we do, you need all the friends you can get. And Moe's is the friendliest place in the rum district.
:they enter the bar and Moe has a gun pointed at somebody's head:
worst17.mp3    116kb 

Moe: Uh, let me buy you a drink.
Comic Book Guy: Very well. I will have a shot of Cranberry Scnappes.
Moe: Haha... uh, these are... they're just painted on there.
Comic Book Guy: Beer is the nectar of the nimwit.
Carl: Hey, are you knocking beer?
Lenny: Nobody badmouth's Duff! :he smashes a bottle, it cuts him: Aw, piece of crap!
worst18.mp3    150kb 

Comic Book Guy: Oh please. If I wanted to hear mindless droning I'd befriend an air conditioner.
Moe: Oh now he's raggin' on air conditioners.
Carl: Hey they keep us cool in the summer, pal.
Lenny: Get 'im!
worst19.mp3    67kb 

Agnes: Out of the way, Tubby.
Comic Book Guy: Oh pardon me, Oldie Hawn.
Agnes: Uh.. Why you ill-mannered sack of crap!
Comic Book Guy: Oh goodie. Now I know whatever happened to Baby Jane.
Agnes: You are the rudest man who ever... bought me dinner!
Comic Book Guy: Correction. I do not believe I ever bought you... oh!
worst20.mp3    145kb 

Bart: We'll never sell these. Birds won't even use them in their nests!
worst21.mp3    56kb 

[ Milhouse yells at Bart about the business ]
worst22.mp3    160kb 

Milhouse: He's got the tape of Kent Brockman picking his nose. Look! He's picking his nose!
worst23.mp3    46kb 

Marge: Oh look at you two. You look so couple-y.
Comic Book Guy: Yes, we're a perfect match. Her sneer just lights up my day.
Agnes: And we're always finishing each other's insults.
worst24.mp3    74kb 

Bart: I must warn you that once this next tape starts, it will not stop! Because that button is broken.
worst25.mp3    56kb 

Chief Wiggum: This place has got more pirated tapes then uuh...
Lou: A Chinese K-Mart?
Chief Wiggum: That'll have to do.
worst26.mp3    44kb 

Scene: But the owner is in more hot water than....
Lou: A Japanese teabag?
Chief Wiggum: Why don't you lay off the Asians, Lou.
worst27.mp3    44kb 

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